We all want to live the best lives possible. There are many obstacles in life, and we can only control so much, but one thing is certain: it is up to us to make any changes necessary for a better life. It is hard to do so these days when everyone on social media looks like their lives are better than ours. Well, don't be misled: pictures are never the full picture. We have made a list of 40 secrets to a better life and, spoiler alert, they don't include how to get more likes on Instagram or more views on Tik Tok. These are some good ways to improve and enjoy your life to the fullest. Read on and try to gradually implement these tools into your daily lives because as Drake taught us years ago...YOLO!
1. Express Gratitude
First off, we can’t improve our lives until we understand what we have. Most of us have it pretty good and that needs to be acknowledged. Even if life seems pretty bad, there are always reasons to smile. Once we show gratitude for what we have, it becomes a lot easier to acquire more great things in life.
Every morning we should make a short mental list of things we are grateful for, with the intention of gradually adding more to the list as life goes on. This is step one, and a key step at that, to the secret of a better life.
2. Quality > Quantity
Would you rather have 100 M&M’s or a bar of the best chocolate in the world? Most people would say the latter. That's a prime example of quality over quantity. A lot of M&M’s are great, but if we could have the best of the best then why wouldn’t we? If we only have what we need, we will buy the best quality. Being a minimalist is a great way to improve our lives because it guarantees that we seek out the maximum quality in what we do have.
This doesn’t only apply to material things. It’s better to have 5 true best friends than 25 superficial relationships.
3. Stop Complaining
Constant complaining takes away time from being positive about situations. Listen, we know sometimes venting and complaining is a must and we are all for that. But for the most part, complaining is not beneficial to anyone, especially not those who have to listen to the kvetching.
Once we realize that we won’t get anywhere by complaining, we will have the time and energy for positive actions that benefit our lives!
4. Take The Trash Out
While we are all for removing some stinky trash out of our homes, we are actually referring to the mental garbage in our minds. It is just as possible to will negative thinking out of existence as it is to will positive thinking into existence. Instead of bombarding our brains with constant downers, we must filter what we allow ourselves to be exposed and think about.
It is so easy to scroll through our phones and watch the news and think we are all doomed. We can instead do simple things like setting a timer for how long each day we are going to expose ourselves to negativities and allow time for some sunshine to sneak into our minds.
5. Mindfulness
Meditation is an ancient practice that most people around the world still do daily, and there are many reasons that it stuck. Meditation and mindfulness can connect us to the moment, ourselves, and to our inner knowing and being. There also have been scientific studies that claim those who meditate live longer.
Even just meditating 5 minutes a day can change our mindset and have major impacts. We challenge you to start meditating every morning. There are a ton of self-guided apps with soothing accents and music to get started!
6. Have a Morning Routine
Meditating and making a mental gratitude note is a perfect example of a morning routine. If mornings start great, the rest of the day is much more likely to follow suit. It is super important to start a day off right because days become weeks and weeks become years and before we know it our morning routines have completely changed our lives for the better.
Make a morning routine of your own! Maybe the first thing you want to do is stretch or eat some cereal. That’s alright! As long as it’s a happy, healthy routine!
7. Feed Your Mind
Eating healthy is important but we also want to feed our brains. By this, we mean books, books, and more books. If we spend half an hour learning new information it will transform our life dramatically. The more we know, the more we grow! Guess what? Most CEO’s read over 50 books a year! We definitely want our readers to run their own businesses.
What’s so awesome about technology is our ability to learn things that took others years to find out about. Google is a gift, use it wisely.
8. Sweat!
We’re not saying run a marathon or become heavyweight champ 2021, but sweat a bit! Moving our bodies will prove very fruitful in moving up our lives. Exercise has been proven to be beneficial mentally and physically and even produces endorphins to make us smile.
A simple 20 minutes of daily movement, even walking to the grocery store, will do wonders for your body and mind. This is not a secret but it is a secret to success.
9. Prioritize Sleep
This can not be stressed enough! Sleep, Sleep, Sleep, my friends! Without sleep, problems become oh so much worse. R & R is needed to combat life's daily stresses and turmoils. Everyone knows the feeling of a beautiful 8 hours of rest and the feeling of a groggy 3 hours of “sleep”. It’s called beauty sleep for a reason.
We aim to get at least 7 hours in a cool, dark room, lock the phone one hour before snoozing, and stop the munching after dinner for proper digestion. Then prepare for all those zzzzzzzzz’s.
10. Start A Day With Energy
We all need our morning coffee to function, but have we ever thought about lemon water as well? Lemon water is proven to clear internal toxins and create a balanced PH in the gut. Coffee also has countless benefits such as energy and focus. If we can remember to start our mornings with Lemon Water as well as Coffee, well then we are basically unstoppable.
Here’s How: Mix half a squeezed lemon in some room temperature water and drink through a straw (paper, obviously) to keep those pearly whites from getting too acidic. Easy!
11. Choose Words Wisely
Sticks and stones may break our bones but words will ALSO hurt us. That should be the real phrase. If we tell ourselves we suck, we start to feel as though we suck. On the other hand, if we tell ourselves we’re smart and successful, it is only a self-fulfilling prophecy from there. We should all speak kindly to ourselves and others and we will reap the benefits. Our brains will confirm our positive biases and better our lives. It’s also just the truth: we are awesome.
The golden rule of treating others how you'd want to be treated applies to yourself as well. Treat yourself as you would like others to treat you and you shall shine like gold.
12. End A Bad Relationship ASAP
There is a major difference between being there for someone through hard times, and staying in a relationship that is just plain old toxic. We respect and admire true friendship or love that survives the ups and downs but when it is just downs and more downs, is that person worth keeping around?
We need to surround ourselves with people who not only make us better but also appreciate who we are now and who we want to become. Anything other than that is just a waste of precious time and energy. Love those who love you and love to learn with you.
13. Say NO
The only thing worse than being a bully is being a pushover. Well, maybe being a bully is always the worst but regardless: Learn to say NO. If we let people walk all over us, believe us, they will. For the most part, there are very few people we owe things too so if we don’t feel comfortable or want to do something, and if it definitely doesn’t make us or our lives better, the answer is...NO.
Now, if someone offers us a free flight to Italy with endless beaches, fashion, pizza, and pasta, then heck yeah we’re gonna scream YES from the rooftop of our little villa on the Amalfi coast. The key is knowing when to say no.
14. Focus on Making a Life instead of Making Money
We know money is important, but it should not consume us. We need to figure out how much money we need to function and be able to live a comfortable lifestyle. Once we do that, we can choose a career that will give us that opportunity. Then we can focus on our lifestyle and not on making more and more and more money. It is hard to have this mindset as we are constantly being shown possessions we convince ourselves we need for an amazing life.
There are studies that show after a certain threshold, more money does not make life easier or happier. We should all find our threshold then commit to focusing on the best lifestyle for us, not on having the best things.
15. Never Stop Learning
Before the pandemic, a lot of us had a commute. We could choose to listen to the same Ariana Grande song 100 times or listen to an audiobook or podcast. We love Miss Grande but sometimes it’s more beneficial to change Thank You, Next to an educational or uplifting podcast.
Vary free time to include entertaining education such as documentaries while also enjoying a favorite Netflix show and listening to great tunes. Just because we’re not in school anymore, doesn’t mean the learning should stop. The world is vast and beautiful and there are always more interesting topics to delve into.
16. Pick ME
“So pick me, choose me, love me,” Meredith Grey says to McDreamy in the iconic Grey's anatomy. This powerful line is something we should be saying to ourselves every day. We should always pick ourselves. Always.
If there is something we are passionate about and need to do, we cannot wait on others. The reason the world is as it is is that people choose their own dreams and regardless of if they felt unworthy, they went for it. As the other cliche saying goes, If not you... Then who?
17. Always Ask Questions
Never accept a fact until you are certain of its truth. Anything we hold and dear to our hearts, we must first question its validity. Most of our truths are based on our own perception of reality. Once we find out what is real, we can live our lives to their most pure form.
Answers to our questions will either reconfirm our biases or steer us in a whole different direction. Those who question have the best base for decision making that can impact the rest of their lives.
18. Look For Real Love
We love rom coms, but the sad reality is that they are all just stories. We cannot believe what we watch on TV to be the truth, emotionally or sexually. That will just set us up for major failure when what we all really want is to be this adorable couple making guacamole.
These are just pixelated fantasies that dilute our idea of reality. Love is real and it is out there but it is hard and messy and it is not what we see in an hour and a half chick flick.
19. Laugh, Then Laugh Again
We all know that laughter makes us live longer, so why do we spend so much time worrying? Take 15 minutes a day to watch, read, or listen to something that will make you laugh. Better yet, we should call our friend that makes us laugh so hard we cry.
Even having a better sense of humor will result in a better life. Try to find the funny in situations, it will make them all that much easier to cope with. Also, we must learn to laugh at ourselves as well as what's around us.
20. Filter Opinions
We must choose wisely who we listen to. Think long and hard before taking advice from someone. If this person has a life we don't respect, would we really want to listen to their “words of wisdom”? Try to seek advice from people that are admirable and accomplished with the results that are being sought.
This being said, always have an open ear. We never know who will say what we need to hear when we need to hear it. Listen with caution, but always be listening.
21. Make Measurements
We don’t want to get all techy, but analyzing and storing data is important for getting the job done. To know if we are improving in something, whether it be fitness, career, relationships, or academics, we must track our success. Managing and measuring performance is a sure way to know how to optimize and improve.
If we care deeply about changing something in our life, we must write down our goals and track our success frequently to measure the journey. This is the only way. Trust us, once we see the results of our labor, the meticulous measurements are well worth it.
22. Love Lists
Nothing is better than crossing something off of a to-do list. Now, if we didn’t make lists we would not be able to feel the thrill of checking things off. Making to-do lists is a guaranteed way to increase productivity. It is an organized manner of knowing what needs to be done and what we want to accomplish.
There are plenty of methods that make this process easy and fun- if writing a list on paper is a bit old school. From computers to apps to thick organizers, you're sure to find a method that works for you.
23. Practice Patience
Improving our lives is a journey and a destination. All good things take time. And what does time require? Lots of persistence and patience. Knowing that success will take time will only grant more success. Big things happen only after many smaller things come together.
If we want to make a worthwhile change in our lives, we must put the work in and wait. Not lazy waiting, but active waiting, with the confidence that better days will come.
24. Ask For Help
Remember when we told you to choose who you listen to wisely. Well, just about all the things we want to accomplish, someone else already has. This being said, we should seek out those people and ask them for help. Never be afraid to ask for help.
Struggling for no reason is just plain old stupid. Things are hard, but we don’t have to take the hard way when we can shorten the process by learning from the best. Having a coach or mentor who cares about our success is one of the many joys of life.
25. Limit Stress
We know this is much easier said than done, but it is incredibly crucial for a happy and healthy life. Not only does stress wreak havoc on our mental system, but also can cause major physical problems. First, we should try to find the leading cause of stress in our lives. Next, we must figure out how to change the cause when possible.
If it's not possible to remove the cause, then we can adapt to the situation and add in coping mechanisms to help manage the stress, such as deep breathing and relaxing walks. Of course, there will always be triggers and stressors and we can't always run off to a calming beach, but knowing how to manage our reactions is critical.
26. Make Healthy Choices (for the most part)
When we feel sad all we want to do is dive into a bag of chips and gorge ourselves with limitless ice cream. Though this does help short-term, and should definitely be done on occasion. For the most part, if we stick to healthier alternatives, our brains and bodies will enable us to live better lives. Of course, we are not saying no to brownies, dare we even suggest such a horror, but making healthy choices is deeply satisfying in the long run,
A cool fact is that we can trick our brains into desiring healthier foods by changing our eating habits over time. Eventually, we may even prefer the sugar in fruit over the sugar in candy. Imagine that!
27. Activate the Mind
We grew up playing with puzzles and games, and we shouldn't stop just because we have full-time jobs. Studies show that changing up a routine from TV to crossword puzzles is a way to keep the mind active and sharp. Even gaming can do the trick. Studies show that video gamers have reaction times that are 25% times better than those who don’t game. Gaming also improves mental health and releases positive emotions.
Other options, if Grand Theft Auto II and Animal Crossings isn’t our thing, are visiting our grandparents and playing cards and bingo to stimulate our brains. Not only are we improving our minds but also spending some good quality time with loved ones.
28. Find Quiet Time
Just like we mentioned with meditation, quiet time is just as important as active time. We must rest! That world seems so hectic nowadays with all of the constant stimulation indoors and outdoors. The only place that seems remotely quiet would be the top of a peak with practicing Buddhists in Asia. Take us there, please!
Anyway, some chill time results in true mental miracles. Relaxation techniques can range from prayer to deep breathing and yoga to short naps, and we like the sound of that last one!
29. Talk
When a thought consumes us, the weightless feeling we get by releasing it into the world or the ears of a trusted confidante is truly priceless. After all, “A problem half shared is a problem half solved”. Repressing feelings results in tension and pain.
If there is something so deep and personal we feel as if we cannot share it with anyone we know, there are always hotlines and online forums to express ourselves when need be. The understanding, acceptance, and support of others are pivotal for conquering problems and building a better life.
30. Nobody Cares!
This is a hard pill to swallow, but nobody truly cares about the things we think they do. The rest of the world barely notices that pimple we've obsessed over in the mirror for 2 hours. The same goes for the new car we bought or the old jacket we’ve worn an extra season. Once we realize this hard-hitting fact, life is much easier to live when we put less pressure on ourselves because we are so concerned about the opinions of others.
People care momentarily about these things and then move on with their own lives and problems. We can't base our happiness on other people's opinions of our lives because they're fleeting and irrelevant in the long-term. We must instead focus on how we feel and what we want to do to improve.
31. Some People Care
Sometimes, rarely but it does happen, a real special gem comes into our lives and really does care. For the most part, these people consist of family members, caring friends, and significant others that will float magically into our lives and give a darn about us. These people will never care about our stuff and possessions but our own values.
These people will look in our eyes and listen to the words we say, be a shoulder to cry on through the rough times, and celebrate with us when life is worth celebrating, which ideally is often. Once we find these people, we must cherish and hold on to them if we care about them as well.
32. Break The Rules (Sometimes)
No, we are not saying to go rob a bank, but maybe think twice before following every “rule” in the book. Some rules are just meant to be broken. Creative people are known to break conformity and think freely. Liberating ourselves from unnecessary limitations allows our minds to explore and create.
There is a beautiful quote by poet Robert Bringhurst that goes “By all means, break the rules, and break them beautifully, deliberately, and well.” For those who don't know how to break the rules, rest assured, there are rulebooks on even that!
33. Recognize Rhetoric
Rhetoric is defined as the art of effective or persuasive speaking or writing, especially the use of figures of speech and other compositional techniques. This art surrounds us daily in advertisements, political discourse, and social media. Recognizing and understanding how rhetoric works enables us to make informed decisions and influence other people in the right way.
If we learn how to speak to change minds, not only can we change our lives but we can better the world as a whole.
34. Realize Responsibilities
Life holds many responsibilities ranging from those to others, to ourselves, and to our work. We are the only ones who can find ourselves success and happiness, but we cannot forget about our responsibility to others. Some only focus on themselves but if we want to better our own lives we should work on the betterment of humanity.
Giving to charity and corporate social responsibility are becoming more of a necessity than a choice. These days we must look out for others in addition to ourselves. As the great all mightily spiderman was told from his grandfather "great power comes with great responsibility". Our spidey senses tingle at that one!
35. Spend Money
Money is everywhere and it has a lot of significance in our lives but should not control our every waking moment. Work hard but enjoy the results. Spend the money if possible on things that bring joy, instead of saving for the sake of having more.
Of course, if it is necessary to save then save but also let loose and take a vacation, try the caviar even though it's gross, and go skydiving. Enjoy the money that was earned, but don't waste it.
36. Save Money
As much as we want to experience everything, it is also important to save.
We must make wise choices with what we have and gain the most with the least. So make a budget and whip out the calculator and glasses just like little piggy bank over here.
37. Plan Alternatives
Always have a plan B. Maybe even a plan C. As the saying goes “you plan, God laughs”. Never assume the intended plan will be the actual outcome. We learned in 2020 that all plans can drastically be ruined and we must adapt to the situation.
We advise risk-taking to the fullest but always have a backup in case that risk fails. 80% of entrepreneurs fail in their first business plan. If they didn’t have a plan B, we wouldn’t have many businesses.
38. Understand Systems
The world is just one huge web of interconnected, dependent systems when we really break it down. Some examples of systems are product systems, service systems, and enterprise systems. Once we understand how these systems work, it is much easier to manage them.
Once you understand the system, you can game the system. We don't mean anything nefarious. Just know the game well enough to win.
39. Learn How To Be Alone
We all need to have a sense of community. But we don’t all need that perfect person for our life to be whole. If that person does come around, brings value, and can be easily integrated into life, then by all means let them in.
On the other hand, we can accomplish everything we want to and better our lives alone and should never be fully reliant on another human being for happiness. We are the ultimate source of our own happiness.
40. Use Mortality as Motivation
We are all going to die. We're sorry, but it’s a fact, Unless of course, you're Wonder Woman or Captain America- then you're basically immortal. Most of us, though, are mere human beings and cannot escape the imminent death that awaits us.
We must embrace this sentiment and use it to live the life of our dreams. Sounds corny but so is YOLO. No heat Drake, we love you!